There is a Buddhist phrase that goes something along the lines of: holding on to a grudge or a resentment is like holding onto a hot coal waiting to throw it at someone ~ it's only burning you!
Forgiveness, lets you set the hot coal down. If you have people in your life, that if they were to walk into the room right now, it would impact your mood in a negative way ~ you have work to do! First off, WHY would you give other people that much control over your life? Second, why would you spend that much energy on people who most likely don't care how you feel anyway?
Maybe it's time to start looking past the 'event' and to just look at the person. Every person on the planet is a divine being! Yep the rapist, the murder, the child molester, and even the judge who didn't kill the person you wanted them too ... is a divine being. It's the ACT'S that you don't like! Learn to separate the person, from the act and you will find your opportunity to forgive the person.
The forgiveness is for YOU, not them! They still have to come to terms with their own demons, if they are to ever forgive themselves. Think about it. Hasn't someone forgiven you for something, but you still felt bad about it? Maybe you should start learning how to forgive others, by looking at some of the things you did in the past and forgiving yourself! You might find that it is much easier to forgive others than it is yourself.
Do the work! Set down the rage, guilt, animosity, remorse, and the like. I promise you, that it will be well worth your time and effort!
Who am I?
I have been called "Sirthinkalot" and "The mender of souls." I am an addiction specialist and a full-time psychology student on the way to Dr. Davis in clinical psychology. I am currently crusading for the expedited paradigm shift in addiction recovery!